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Oct. 30th, 2006 @ 09:18 am Hot Babe
Current Mood: bouncybouncy
I am a hot babe.

Even though I'm claiming it, there are some cringing embarrassment at the periphery but i choose to ignore it.. because it is more fun being a hot babe than being a beautiful person who is blind to her own greatness..

This life seminar i am taking called LEAP is helping me bring out the me I've always wanted to be. I feel so happy and blessed to be re-discovering and reclaiming the power I have...

Some of my major learnings:

1) Goals will literally fall into my lap without me working hard for it.. if only i totally embrace my wholeness and exude my greatness. A new car won't make me affluent. Several hot dates won't make me attractive and desirable... when I feel already affluent and desirable and loving inside.. that new car and those dates are just bonuses... reflections of what is already within.

2) Planning sometimes doesn't work. There are times where being "in the present moment" matters more. I plan what I'll say, what I'll share, what will make me appear smart and confident.. but in the middle of the sharing i connected to what i am saying.. i allowed myself to feel and veered from the script in my head then suddenly i am about to cry in front of those people i barely knew.. sharing a very intimate thing about me.. this wasnt the plan.. but it feels damn good.. and that moment reminded me my spontaneity is what i have been repressing and what has been making me feel un-excited and un-joyful..

i am so happy to feel and to just be...

3) The Makeover.. there's a chair with my name on it.. i entered a room and this team of fashionistas, hairdressers and make up artists where all over me.. i felt scared but excited.. a fresh new talent who is about to enter a tv show.. and wow.. i never thought i could were a tube and high heeled clogs, ears dangling with huge hoop earrings and strut my stuff.. RAMPA RAMPA.. and the crowd cheered... the way I hear people cheer in may daydreams and fantasies of being a hot babe in the spotlight.. i've always thought they are just harmless fantasies that aren't really meant for reality.. there is joy and comfort in keeping fantasies unreal cuz making it real will lose its appeal... BUT HOW WRONG I WAS... I've always wanted to feel beautiful but i haven't been taking my body seriously in figuring out what will make it feel and look good...

and damn, I saw the made over me and I looked good.. but more importantly I am amazed by my own daring and beauty.

LEAP is making the old shy me very very uncomfortable... but the me I have always keeping control of.. the wild woman who wants to be like Angelina Jolie, live out adventures... that inner me is very very happy.

God, thank you for life and chances. MMMMMWAH!

(for those who are interested to know more about these life boosting seminars I am talking about, just shoot me an email at gusts_of_clarity@yahoo.com)
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